An Offer I Can't Refuse

Opportunities present themselves to us each day. We have free will to play or pass. Sometimes playing can be so much fun but have may have detrimental consequences, on the other hand passing can be boring and you may miss out on something really good. So there lies the dilemma... until an offer is made that you can't refuse no matter the risk or uncertain consequences. What makes an offer a Don Vito Corleone type, one that can't be refused? I'm not sure, could be that some offers are so sweet that they outweigh the sting of the refusal. Or maybe the curious nature of our inner being begs us to take the chance. Whatever the reason I appreciate the fact that sweet offers are made... one's that I dare not refuse.

Easy Like Sunday Morning

I have recently ended my hiatus and started attending a local church on a semi-regular basis. For the past 18 months I have been recouping from the internal scars that were left from the last church I attended (name and denomination will remain anonymous). The traumatic scars were related to the manner in which my former church dealt with ideals that were traditional and legalistic and have no biblical validity. Soon after I left the church... and decided to get a divorce I was met with resistance and the guarantee that God would not forgive me. I longed for the fellowship and praise and worship that I grew up on as a child in Mississippi but was afraid of the judgemental glares that I would receive from the parishioners as I passed their pews with my two fatherless children. I continue to have that uncomfortable feeling when I sporadically attend and wonder what is truly behind the smiles, holy hugs and handshakes and the words of welcome all done in the name of Jesus.

Having Your Cake and Eating It Too

On the eve of my birthday... this topic seems appropriate... I like cake and I like to eat it. Why wouldn't want someone want to eat their cake? For instance if someone gave me a birthday cake tomorrow... am I wrong to eat it? But in real life situations that have nothing to do with chocolate and calories it's wrong to have your cake and eat it too. Why? Is it greedy? double dipping? What? Can I learn to be content by just having this nicey baked and decorated chocolate cake that smells so good and looks so moist that you can just taste it... or must I indulge and satisfy my sense of taste and have a bite...even just the smallest taste will appease my taste buds... or will it? More than likely I will want another bite and eventually the whole thing. A moment on the lips... a lifetime on the hips."

How Can You Hurt The Ones You Love?

Sounds kinda cliche', I know, but it's real talk. I'm guilty of it, sometimes it has been consciously, other times unconsciously, nontheless someone I love has gotten hurt. In a perfect world we could do and say whatever we wanted without the risk of hurting our loved ones, but that it not our reality. I often wonder if we love someone is it better to be transparent and risk hurting them or interalize to protect thier feelings? Someone I love chose the first option... that shit hurt... but in hindsite it helped. Perhaps the person that choses to be transparent is more brave... I don't know. Either way there are going to be consequences...that will elicit pain internally and externally.

You betta blow that sh**t out

I first heard that term from Jamie Foxx during one of his stand ups. He explained that he was using the term as a metaphor for not "holding in" sh**t. You know that type of shit that causes you stress, anger, anxiety, guilt, frustration, sadness, bitterness, hopelessness, etc... ? That s**t will kill you. You gotta learn to blow that s**t out... When I think about the access s**t that I allow to occupy mental space in my head...it's scary. I have been waiting to exhale a lot of s**t over the last year... primarily guilt for me. Someone very close to me recently reminded me that my feelings and happiness were most important. This statement conflicted with the way of thinking that I had developed during my 4 year, 364 day marriage to a devout Christian, who influenced me to believe that even when your not happy,God wants you to be content. It has been over a year since my divorce and I am just learning to blow out the guilt s**t left over from it, not realizing how much it was choking me. I'm breathing a lot better these days, but I'm still having a hard time learning to bask in my happiness, when it causes someone else pain.

Cheers BFF

Here's to the greatest BFF in the world! My girl, Lynn (she so wants me to mention her by name) and I have been friends since we were 5 and 6 years old. We have shared a lot over the years... (never men). Lynn supports me and has my back like chi ro prac tic (thanks Andre) We talk almost everyday and always have something to talk about (that's amazing). Lynn has the ability to be brutally honest without making me feel bad, I appreciate that. Lynn and I have created so many memories and have a huge archive of inside jokes, which can be frustrating to those who don't have a point of reference. I'm laughing right now, because just last week we created more. I thank God for blessing me with such a wonderful BFF!

There's Something About Virgos

There is no doubt about it, you'll know almost immediately that you have been smitten by Virgo's charm and wit. At first you may be annoyed by Virgo's attention to detail and need for perfection, then just when you're ready to scream... Virgo will sing a song to you that recreates that special time and place. You melt and then it happens... your heart will never be the same. Virgo ask for little but gives so much. You will be amazed by Virgos intelligence and ability to see right through you. Virgo is very passionate about everything he does, so if you are the object of his affection, watch out! Virgo is a sensitive lover... and remember that annoying attention to detail and need for perfection? This is where it pays off. You will always get what you need. Virgo will make you laugh and cry, but most of all Virgo will reach deep into your heart and cradle and protect it like their life depended on it.